Philia-Friends

      Friends and summer, they just fit together kind of like ketchup and mustard.  With this being the last weekend of summer and college starting on Monday I look back to reminisce of all the good times with my friends.  I just saw a picture taken at the funeral for a Navy SEAL, his dog was lying right next to the casket softly sighing.  They say dogs are man’s best friend, looking at that picture and seeing the loyalty in that dogs eyes I found that statement to be more true than ever.  No matter where that Navy SEAL went his “best friend” would always be there to welcome him home.  Even when he came home in a casket his dog was there unmoving, faithfully fulfilling his friendship till the very end.

       My friends never cease to surprise me.  From the ones who want to drug me with Nyquil, or find my annoyance unbearable, or were strangers one day one of my good friends the next, they have all blessed me with the gift (and sometimes curse :P) of their friendship.  The Bible verse “A friend loveth at all times” Proverbs 17:17a has never really struck me as anything spectacular until I realized how true it is.  A true friend loves you, no matter what you say or what you do.  I say stupid things, A LOT, every once in a blue moon I have a moment of genius and say the right thing, but no matter what I say or what I do I know my friends love me--at all times. 

I looked up friendship on Wikipedia and here is an excerpt from it:

“Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis:

▪   The tendency to desire what is the best for the other

▪   Sympathy and empathy

▪   Honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one's counterpart

▪   Mutual understanding and compassion

▪   Trust in one another (able to express feelings - including in relation to the other's actions - without the fear of being judged); able to go to each other for emotional support

▪   Positive reciprocity - a relationship is based on equal give and take between the two parties.

Whereby you can be oneself & make mistakes without fear of judgment.”

       I’ve found that my closest friends are the ones who are always willing to lend a hand---to either help or slap my face, a lot of times it’s both.

"Better is open rebuke 
than hidden love.

Wounds from a friend can be trusted, 
but an enemy multiplies kisses." Proverbs 27:5-6

 But they don’t nag me, they don’t shut me down with negativity, they quiet me when I’m loud, and let me speak when I’m quiet.   They are the ones who challenge me to daily seek God and encourage me to be my best even when I feel like my worst should suffice.  Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 However, sometimes there are those friends who just don’t encourage us.

       1 Corinthians 15:33 “Do not be deceived: Bad company ruins good morals.” My mom would always quote this to me she really wanted me to understand how quickly one can fall when they are surrounded by “bad company.”  I've always related this verse to people whose sin is outwardly visible, they gloat in it and try to convince you to join them when you can clearly see you’d never want to be like them.  But I’ve come to find that the term “bad company” is much more than outward sin.  When I would talk to friends who are constantly negative about others and always complaining I too would become more negative. They never had an encouraging word and were always looking for something to “prey” on.  "What then, brothers? When you come together, each one has a hymn, a lesson, a revelation, a tongue, or an interpretation. Let all things be done for building up." 1Corinthians 14:26 

       Once I distanced myself from these people and started talking more to friends who constantly encouraged me I found my outlook on life changed.  Because I stopped listening to the negative comments I found I had more time to either spend with God or talk to friends who were uplifting.  Sure friends have their days when they just need to vent (“AHHHHH!!!!!!!!” hahaha) but don’t go along with it and have a pity party, tell them to look for the bright side.  Life is good, God is great and there’s a blessing in every trial.  

       True friendship isn’t a fashion piece; it doesn’t go in and out of style.  Although friends may have to leave, whether it’s to college or marriage or a billion other reasons, you know they are never too far out of reach that you can’t talk to them.  

And friends are friends forever

If the Lord's the Lord of them

And a friend will not say never

'Cause the welcome will not end

Though it's hard to let you go

In the Father's hands we know

That a lifetime's not too long to live as friends.