Saturday, July 28, 2012

Faith


“For we walk by faith, not by sight.” 2 Corinthians 5:7

            I’ve tried to write this blogpost over and over again, never finding the right words, I deleted and tried again, each time I ended up deleting it again and shutting down my computer in frustration. However after meeting Faith I knew I had the right words.
Faith is a young girl of seventeen, she came with her family to help us unload the trucks at our new place, her hair was pulled back and her clothing some would say extremely modest.  Every time I turned around there was Faith, waiting for me to give her something to do, “Put me to work Heidi, I can do it!”  She never stopped, she worked just as energetically as the men and with a mirth about her.  Faith is partially deaf, she can hear, but you have to speak straight to her for her to actually understand. Through it all Faith never has given up, she never let her slurred speech or lack of hearing let herself become bitter—true to her name she stayed faithful in a God who knew what He was doing when He created her.
“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1

I never knew if my decision to stay in California was right, I felt God wanted me there but there were always those nagging thoughts of “you have never been without your family…you will fail” and “what makes you think you can do this?”  “But God wants me here!” I would tell myself over and over again, still I felt helpless. He never said following Him would be easy…have faith…have faith…
“By faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that the things which are seen were not made of things which are visible.” Hebrews 11:3


By faith we see the hand of God 
In the light of creations grand design
In the lives of those who prove His faithfulness
Who walk by faith and not by sight 


            There were nights I wanted to run away, days I wished I had never existed, I honestly don’t think I’ve ever cried so much in my life.  Looking back now I see how God used that situation to bring me closer to Him, to desire to be apart of His plan for me.  Not knowing what to do caused me to search His Word, and through those words I saw how desperate I am apart from Him, through the pain of it all I found the beauty of His Words, and the passion of His calling It’s not easy…have faith…
“…for it is God who works in you, both to will and to do for His good pleasure.”  Philippians 2:13

By faith this mountain shall be moved
And the power of the gospel shall prevail
For we know in Christ all things are possible
For all who call upon His name

            I look up to the beautiful blue country sky, I’m sitting under an apple tree, in the soft grass with grape vines all around me; I dearly love this place, it’s a perfect country home, but it’s not my home.  I know this now, I know where I have been called and those nagging thoughts have been put to rest, people may still question but I know what God has called me to do and to be for now.    
By faith the church was called to go
In the power of the Spirit to the lost
To deliver captives and to preach good news
In every corner of the earth
We will stand as children of the promise
We will fix our eyes on Him our soul's reward
Till the race is finished and the work is done
We'll walk by faith and not by sight

          For faith was energetic, every time I turned around there it has been staring me in the face saying “Put me to work Heidi, let go, let faith take over.” It was waiting mirthfully for me with lessons and challenges, each one telling me to have faith in the God who created me and who has a plan much greater than my own.  My home is not with my family, it’s not with my friends, or school, or even necessarily California, my home is where God calls me to be a light.  My home is in Him, for now that place is California, but who knows where else He may call me.
           

         All these heavy thoughts will try to weigh you down,
 but not this time.


Way up in the air, you're finally free.

All this gravity will try to pull you down,
but not this time.


When the sun goes down, and the lights burn out,

Then it's time for you to shine.

Brighter than the shooting star,
so shine no matter where you are.

Fill the darkest night, with a brilliant light,

'cause it's time for you to shine.

Brighter than a shooting star,
so shine no matter where you are

1 comment:

  1. I love this, Heidi. I wanna be as mature and courageous as you are when I grow up!

    ReplyDelete